Face to Face by S. Michael Wilcox

I officially have a new favorite book that I want to share from the rooftops with every faith-seeking person I know.

I was so grateful when Deseret book gave me the opportunity to read S. Michael Wilcox's latest book, Face to Face: Seeking a Personal Relationship with God. If you are not familiar with Brother Wilcox and his powerful way of highlighting life-changing truths out of the scriptures, take a few minutes before you read this review to listen to his talk The Fourth Watch (scroll down to the end of the post to watch the video), or to read this devotional he gave at BYU-Hawaii.



Brother Wilcox was one of my Book of Mormon professors back in the day. His class and the one I took from Susan Easton Black played important roles in the process of really gaining my firm testimony of the Book of Mormon. So I feel a special, personal connection with Brother Wilcox -- even though I realize I am only one of the thousands of people who have been so influenced by him.

I have long had a testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ and the restoration of the Church of Jesus Christ. I have known that God is aware of me; I have felt Him guide my life, particularly at major crossroads times of decision.

But it's only in the last few years that I've come to realize how much I still have yet to know and understand about my Heavenly Father and His very personal love for me. This book helped deepen both my testimony of God's love, and my desire to reach out more to build a relationship with Him and trust in Him more in my life.

As is Brother Wilcox's style, he uses a masterful combination of scriptural insight and personal experience to discuss ways we can not just pray, but reach in our communication with Heavenly Father. He discusses reaching through pouring out, reaching through wrestling, reaching through believing, reaching through acting, and reaching through knocking. The principles in each chapter weave and fold into each other, but I think (at least on my first reading), the first chapter is my favorite. I wept as I read and felt the power of his insights and testimony.

The following quote has stayed with me. As someone who spent a lot of time holding back in my prayers, I find this notion of pouring out (something, again, I've only started to understand in the last few years) is extremely profound.

Brother Wilcox uses the poignant example of Hannah in the scriptures, “who poured out her soul out of the abundance of her complaint and grief.”

“The soul can be described as a vessel that fills from time to time with various emotions, thoughts, memories, questions, and so forth. The very phrase pour out suggests this visual image. I have found it useful to see my soul as a vessel; I often ask myself what it contains before I kneel before the Lord. There is a difference to my approach when I say “I’m going to pour out my soul to God” rather than “I’m going to say my prayers.” The very phrase suggests there will be no holding back…. It is helpful to me to understand or recognize exactly what is in my soul. I must be totally honest with myself. Is it confusion, or doubt, or sorrow, or love, or gratitude, or guilt, or shame, or worry? I believe what the Father wants from us is the contents of our souls. I sense that unless we pour out, he cannot pour in. We want to make sure we empty everything to make room for what he will give us in return” (p. 19).

I'm reminded of President Eyring's talk about the pavilions that can sometimes keep us from feeling God's love for and awareness of us. Brother Wilcox shares his own personal experiences with doubt, grief (he lost his wife to cancer a couple of years ago), inadequacy, fear...the emotions that most mortals will struggle with at some point or another. This book feels like a sort of pouring out, a vulnerable, powerful testimony of what can happen when we are vulnerable with our Father.

This book is a treasure. I cannot recommend it enough.